after Os plan:
1) Clear my room
2) Repaint my room
3) Get new furniture
4) Ice skating
5) Job Getting paid $50 a week to tutor ^^
6) Shop for:

a) a new bag (MY BROWN ONE BROKE!!)
b) another pair of heels
c) another pair of flats
d) Threadless Bought 3 new shirts ^^
e) shorts
f) Vans 'Old Skool Originals' + another pair of slip-ons
g) MORE CLOTHESSSSS

7) Rollerblade
8) Read!

i. A Fraction of a Whole by Steve Toltz
ii. Blink by Malcolm Gladwell
iii. Kafka on the Shore by Haruki Murakami
iv. The Time Traveler's Wife by Audrey Niffenegger
v. Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy
vi. In our time - the speeches that shaped the modern world by Hywel Williams
vii. Pygmalion by Bernard Shaw
viii. A Tale of Two Cities by Charles Dickens
ix. One Day by David Nichols
x. Sophie's World by Jostein Gaardner
xi. Fight Club by Chuck Palahniuk
xii. The Lonesome Traveller by Jack Kerouac

9) Skateboard??
10) BB + Mac
11) Cook
12) Sleepover with the crew -- Kathleen, Cara, Charmaine
13) Escape theme park (unconfirmed, Shi can't make it on 28/11)
14) Birthday card for NJT
15) Outing with 8039?
Edit 30/11:
16) Buy Polaroid film
17) Taiwan??
18) Buy 2010 Moleskine diary
19) Meet Esther to pass her books + notes
20) Get lost in a part of Singapore with someone (with a camera on hand)
21) Phototrip
22) Outing with Tiff/LGB?
23) Outing with Shyen and Fi
24) Outing with Angie
25) Walk the connector park thing @ Stagmont Ring with someone
Edit 4/12:
26) Meet Sau to pass her her book + card
27) Make cards for everyone I know

"What Checkhov was getting at is this: necessity is an independent concept. It has a different structure from logic, morals or meaning. Its function lies entirely in the role it plays. What doesn't play a role shouldn't exist. What necessity requires does need to exist."

"Yeah, but if you look at it like that we're all pretty much empty, don't you think? You eat, take a dump, do your crummy job to get your lousy pay and get laid occasionally, if you're lucky. What else is there?"

"The strength I'm looking for isn't the kind where you win or lose. I'm not after a wall that'll repel power coming from outside. What I want is the kind of strength to be able to absorb that outside power, to stand up to it. The strength to quietly endure things - unfairness, misfortune, sadness, mistakes, misunderstandings."

"Sure, that can happen. We have an experience - like a chemical reaction - that transforms something inside us. When we examine ourselves later on, we discover that all the standards we've lived by have shot up another notch and the world's opened up in unexpected ways. Yes, I've had that experience. Not often, but it has happened. It's like falling in love."

Kafka on the shore by Haruki Murakami
/

(papertissue)Hope so
/
So today I had my long awaited meal at Fish & Co! I love it a lot, but today of all days me and Shyen became so full even though we were only 1/8 through our meal! I'm quite sad I couldn't savour it :(

After our meal we went to Cine. I don't know why though. So we went into Diva and I got some nice trinkets (and apparently Elan and Mich saw me there?!


We took a bus back to school and Shyen departed because she had to help with CCMC youth camp prep. Fiona and I took a bus to railmall and we attempted to spy on Angie, Amanda Koh and her mysterious guy friend but he left early!! (Update: now I know who he is hahaha) So we stayed in Subway to tease Angie and after that we walked up the extremely steep but fast shortcut to her house and we did many silly things (played with hats and wigs, watched Charlie the unicorn part 2 and 3, played truth or dare and played with her brother's gun! I even left a note hehe)


( More silly Photobooth pictures... )

Goodnight,

P/s

I had a spontaneous urge to go over to Angie's house yesterday so I did! We did a lot of silly things, the usual. Sometimes I wonder how we're supposed to act when we're 16. I remember we (Cara, Kathleen, Charmaine, Me) used to write about being 15 or older and how our lives would have been. I have to say it is less than what I expected.

First she showed me videos from charlieissocoollike. He's so funny and cute!! Then I managed to persuade Angie into making instant Tom Yam noodles for me. I am so sneaky. Hehe. We continued to laze around and she showed me the clothes she got for herself and her brother from Hong Kong/Shen zhen. After that we played around in her brother's room because he has so many guns! I have photo evidence. And I have a new found love for capturing people's rooms.

So here's a typical 13 year old boy's room:




Okay so, 1 gun

Another 2 guns (3)

World map, I digress.

Okay so, ACS(I) class picture with puny boys!

Odd, martian thing.

Bao Zhang Bao Dao!!! After Os, I sort of miss studying

Another (4)

A ball thing

Boys like to take pictures with Astroboy! Also note that they like wearing stripey things (Striped polo and striped hoodie)

(I didn't take any more pictures but he has 1 other gun so in total he has 5 toy guns!)
This is a stupid picture of how the suction bullets work.........

Back in her room,

Me using Angie's FREE HP mini notebook. It has Windows 7! (nerd talking)

Nicole Thio talking to Angie



I'm being lame.







I don't know why Angie turns out to be a blur everytime







Angie as a kid. Note her strange natural auburn ish-brown hair.

+ Silly photobooth pictures













In these few photos you can see that we weren't prepared in taking 4 consecutive shots so we look really, really stupid.







I also have videos, but please go on facebook to view them!
/
Apart from everything I've been doing, I really want to find a church I'm comfortable being in. Currently I'm very disillusioned because a lot of people go to church just to socialise and I don't know which church is actually sincere about getting their youths to worship God. I don't know where to find that church. I've been praying on and off about it but no answer has popped up.
/
My sister likes to give me redundant answers.
A girl on a tv show has a white thing supporting her head and I asked "Why is that thing on her head?" she tells me "Something happened."

It's also confirmed that I'm going to Taiwan and I'm going to be sitting in Business class by myself!! I'm sort of afraid I'll get lost. But silly me, how does one get lost on a plane?

I am so looking forward to dinner. I'm also already 2/3 through Kafka on the Shore.

BRE∆K∆BLE says (5:50 PM):
i was dreaming about being in love. and when i woke up i wanted to fall asleep again. i tried to prolong the dream. and when i really decided to be awake it's like. love is boring. you kiss you hug you go out w/ each other but you'll feel the same feeling and it's like eh love has no more meaning...
haha
at least it fills up your time

faith + hope + pixie dust says (5:52 PM):
wow
that was a long.
what do you call that
but
love is comforting
somewhat
but I'm afraid of loving someone already
I feel like I've given all my luuuv away

faith + hope + pixie dust says (5:53 PM):
is that even possible I'm only 16 wow

BRE∆K∆BLE says (5:53 PM):
i don't know. i forgot how to love. and i don't find anymore meaning in love. i mean only the love towards a guy. love for family love for friends and for God i understand. but love for a guy is like..... some unknown language i once knew but now forgotten.

faith + hope + pixie dust says (5:54 PM):
yeah I was just thinking about that
like all the times I feel love
is only for my friends/family

faith + hope + pixie dust says (5:55 PM):
not so much for my family now anyway
like I don;t know if what I feel for a guy is love anymore
and if I'm not sure then.

BRE∆K∆BLE says (5:55 PM):
then what's the point
:<
>:

faith + hope + pixie dust says (5:56 PM):
I don't know if it's worth it to like. give yourself o somebody for only a few months and live in a ~fairytale~ world only to see it. go back to reality that really. nothing lasts forever (not now at least)
like I know it will end. so why do I bother anymore
):

BRE∆K∆BLE says (5:57 PM):
i know right.....
we are so sad!

faith + hope + pixie dust says (5:57 PM):
haha
we're like
so heartbroken
wow it sounds so scary
like talking about it

"Love is either unconditional or it's no love. You might like someone conditional on their personality or behavior or circumstances. But love accepts no boundaries. So never say 'I love you because', for love has no cause, love comes from God."

I always need to find reasons to justify my actions, but I guess I now know that I love because love just is. I need to remember that.


////
I'm so tired of people using me. I try so hard to please everyone, waiting for them to thank me or realise how much I do for them, but that never fully happens. They probably don't even think of me or love me like I love them.
And why not? How do their minds work? Why can they purposely subconsciously forget about being grateful and showing appreciation? Do they ever know that I get hurt by their ignorance?

////
I wonder how I am to face life. It's like I know what's going to happen - life is, in a nutshell, full of ups and downs. If I'm going through a good point, a bad thing is soon going to happen, and if I'm going through a bad point, it's vice versa. That's how things are in life, so do I anticipate the good and bad? Do I sit around being happy about the impending good situation? Or do I sit around dreading the bad? Since I know these things, must I pretend to not be aware and not label things in my life good/bad in order to enjoy the essence of life? Since I know these things, will my life end now?